and those juicy C cups turned out to be oddly-shaped A's when her padded bra came off.
The only reason I kept his number in my phone for so long is so that hed pay for my abortion.
you told the cop you blew a .08 because you ate poppy seeds
So I had to explain to her that pussy doesn't mean a cat
either she said she was feeling frisky or eating friskies..i was too drunk to understand.
do you think having her use a clorox disinfecting wipe on her vagina will keep me from getting her herpes if I don't have a condom?
I came home to burning cookies and him outside "tanning" naked.
He just wants an even tan
It's only 8pm and Karl already got a stripper fired.
Delete her number from his phone. He keeps slurring how he's going to get her "all sorts of pregnant".
Woke up on the stairs at my parents house. Good start to vacation.
I have nothing to say for myself. When 2chainz comes on at the bar all bets are off.
my ass is still wet. this is highly unpleasant. give me 5 to get changed and I'm all yours. or you can yell things to me while I shower and burn clothes
You kidnapped her dog. I don't care that you and the dog are epic bros, that's just not cool. Return him.
Looks like I'm not in the Ashly Madison files. But my wife is.
Serious question: is he hot or is my vagina just that barren?
Randomize