question: masturbation: how much is too much? I think i'm about to tip toe a fine line
I shaved my pubes to make my cock look like it has a lions mane. to surprise the girl that works at the zoo when she comes over.
We were doing it doggy style, and I puked on the floor and started crying, he told me it was okay his cat would eat it... and if it would make me feel better we could do anal...
And they lived happily ever after....
I love having a vagina, its like having the keys to a city
it was the drunk execution of a sober decision, and its much more tasteful than the first mullet
I'm in class. I'm not opening a page with the words "death erection" in the link. There's people behind me lol.
The whiskey is fighting the tequila on who wants to be the one who end my night first.
took adderall before wrapping presents, ended up making paper snowflakes for two hours
oh my god, just saw a man throw up in a trashcan and blood came out of his nose. HES GETTING ON MY BUS. HES SITTING ACROSS FROM ME. FUCK.
If he's the sort of guy that will fuck in a public restroom, he's the sort of guy that will cheat on his gf. I'm goin for it.
Can I borrow your google glasses to make a sex tape?
so, in conclusion, I think his gf found out about the booty pics
I found a 9 minute video on my phone of you singing into an eggplant.
I had to ask her to let go of my cock this morning so I could go home. She just kept saying "no, please, no..."
its a comptetion of fuckups and im HERE TO WIN
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