I am so gay it hurts my loins. Going to see She's Just Not That Into You... again. Ohhh my goodness.
So is it bad that I'm using this 21 year old for his hot bod and utter naivety?
No its what 21 year olds are made for
idk why but i just wanna to have sex with the idea of him. i don't even wanna meet him.
I left a bag of circus animal cookies in my car all day. they melted together into on giant cookie. this could either be the best or worst thing ever
i hope kanye doesn't show up to patrick swayze's funeral. " i'll let you get back to your funeral in a minute...but michael jackson had the best death of the year. just sayinnn ".
We left the bar, went to a sex shop, bought penis shotglasses, went back to the bar and insisted that the bartender used them.
Why isn't there a sort by hair color option on Facebook? It would make stalking much easier.
I will be sticking my dick in something this weekend. You can either be that something or not. Your decision.
Please. I don't care how shitty his fake life story was. As horny as I was I just wanted the prettiest man possible in case I accidentally got pregnant. He had blue eyes.
I hope you have a dream of a sloth with my face touching you erotically
I tried to twerk on a barn in 3 inch heels at a party last night and nose dived into mud. These were all new friends. I'm probably not allowed back. Cool.
I'm about to be a GTA V widow, he could at least throw me a bone. Literally.
There is a drunken, assless white chick here at this bar wearing a shirt that says "REAL WOMEN TWERK FOR JESUS". I have officially had it with our generation.
People who don't like drugs and guac are not people I chose to associate with
Apparently I had 2 bloody noses and after my sis put me to bed at the hotel, I escaped and my sister's friend found me in an elevator with some guy
Randomize
