You're in luck. The brownies don't even have butter, just vege oil
Also, our mothers are placing bets on which of us will get pregnant first.
First date. He's wearing a tuxedo shirt and keeps asking me about our future children. Escape plan #3 is now in action...
Lauren she was gnawing on a dresser. Gnawing. On. A. Dresser.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
I just walked in on my roommates playing baseball with old vegetables and a bigass knife.
Why yes actually, getting stoned and reading an AARP magazine IS totally where I wanted my night to end!
I was paranoid that someone would jizz in my hair while I had the cucumbers over my eyes. Super-High Spa Day didnt work out.
her vagina just converted me to Judaism.
How was the party? Lets put it this way: "He wants her dick" was a factual sentence stated last night.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
iphones do not disturb setting is the biggest cock block to my 3am booty calls
Just remember that I named his dick Robo-cock before he got into the sheriff's department.
I continue to impress myself. Also I'm probably pregnant
I dropped my pants and she just stared until she asked how is that even possible? Best night ever lmao
Shotgunning beers in the shower. Mom would be proud.
Sorry didnt text you yesterday. had to put restraining order on my ex.
Randomize