Cuntadactyl. (n). A pre-historic dinosaur of Mandy-like features that is primarily identified by it's inability to play well with others and overall C-word demeanor. Physically, an unfortunate appearance.
she said she'd blow me if I bought one of her sorority raffle tickets. Goddamn it's gettin easy
It's almost summer. We need to start reconnecting with our home drug dealers.
I swear I only do things like fuck 19 yr olds just to hear how you laugh when I tell you.
I am going to wait until he wakes up to set his couch on fire and then pee it out. That way he knows it was not an accident.
i was mezmorized. she was the most beautiful girl that looked like a boy i ever seen
Oh my god. You have got to get off that breast feeding support group. They're on to you, dude.
I have learned that if you don't want to hook up with the guy who walked you home, food is great compensation.
I have one of those hangovers where you visualize how awesome it would be to climb in your fridge and drink glacier water
Well my sober pact lasted almost an hour. Then I did four shots. But in other news, one of those shots I took with a midget. So like I couldn't turn that shit down.
I found a playlist on my ipod with only one song on it: gold digger. confused, but not surprised.
My nerves will need dicks later so.. I'll call you
Blacked out and Irish exited last night. At dinner. On a Sunday.
I don't remember what you did, but I DO remember that i'm supposed to hate you for it.
Come on in and take your pants off
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