JACOB AND UGLY BROKE UP
As a pleasant surprise..I woke to find a Burrito and Bottle of Gatorade .....Merry XMAS to ME
I spent all day at the mall with her, then she made me actually watch a walk to remember then decided to tell me she was on her period. This one is either really crafty or I am really desperate.
You know your in college when you use the receipt from the liquor store as a bookmark
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
All we did was argue about ponys and drug dealers
1 month til my stepdad becomes a u.s. citizen, so if you want to get in on the divorce pool its your last chance, $5 a square.
I just pull a splinter from the head of my penis. It was a rough night.
Ya well here is the deal with last night, it was the Biggest shit show we have ever co-stared in.
His balls looked like two miss shaped chicken nuggets
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
I am tired of banking on my penis size to overcome my lack of game.
Just got offered a dog by two Meth head's one of which wasn't wearing shoes and continually saying "fuck"
I apparently used the line "I'm a bouncer too so i would know if I were too drunk" then they asked me to leave.
At least I had a $10 coupon for Plan B today. Smart shopping for bad decisions
He said "I can't believe I had sex with a cat lady". Am I flattered or is this a new low?
Did you guys just have three hour sex? You both stopped and restarted texting me at the same time
If I were to say yes, would we still be friends?
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