so as we were driving to pick up my grandma from old navy she procedes to yell into our open window.. "I'll make ya holla fo a dolla" umm...
It was ok at first, but now im getting freaked out by him jerking off to me doing yoga
We're smoking a joint the size of the average penis right now. I may not survive.
My mom and dad are smoking a joint while lecturing me on what to bring and how to act in Europe. I'll finish this glass of wine and head over.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
For future reference "bring our litter sisters on our date day" is not such a good idea
After being his wingman last night, I've decided I will never talk about becoming a lesbian ever again. Picking up chicks is way too hard.
On NPR this morning, farmers are feeding weed to pigs. The result: pot bacon. Life just got better.
I've seen you dance and let's just say its a good thing you don't have a small dick
And now I have a massive dip in and a Bloody Mary that would catch on fire if you put a flame close to it, with no pants on... At 8:15Am. Being single is pretty legit
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
I kept on yelling at him to get his shit together as he was puking
guess who got crunk and thought it would be a good idea to give herself a pixie cut?
THOUGHT
You'll be happy to know that the bruise is gone from my cock
If more people understood that brunch is at 3pm the world would be a better place because you don't have to wake up early. Breakfast food is important
Ehh, the third backed out. Two still isn't bad. Who gets a bootycall to pick them up from a bootycall's house anyways? Only me.
i'm currently watching a guy eat a bunch of cacti and i have lost all faith in humanity
**cactuseses
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