I bet he comes in French.
He said if I blew him first he'd last longer....if 3 minutes is lasting longer, I'm not sure the bj was worth it
My "High Times" magazine came in today, as well as my girlfriend's new sex toys. We're calling in sick today.
I thought you just gave him blowjobs and he criticized your drug use.
Drinking franzia alone at noon watching a cheese themed episode of "The Chew" I'm ready to admit I need a job.
there is nothing worst than getting kicked in the face by a stripper
I'm going through a really dark time right now
I don't want to hear it man. I just jerked it to a pic of my ex wife in a bikini. Buck up
The sad part is that if I don't get a random pic of your balls or ass or both every month, I start to worry that we're not friends anymore
Thank you contacting dial-a-boner. Currently, our boner is on a run to service another client. You can either wait 2 hours for service, or share concurrent service with the current client.
Mmhmmm. I have a list of drunk achievement that is almost as long as my list of stoned achievements
Well while you were being a dick I was taping back together a cougars broken heart
First he fixed my gutter. Then he flogged me and fucked me. Then he bought me a new vacuum cleaner. I don't understand Daddy Dom stuff but I ain't mad at it.
I think our maternal nature is best focused on grown ass men and cats.
I wasn't supposed to sleep w him. So of course I sent him gps location to my bed.
My life is pants optional.
Randomize
