she woke up with a sticky ear
New pre-game routine....wal-mart bathrooms...quality beers for free...hallelujah
are any of them hardcore sluts...just absolute worthless human beings? if not the paper wins
maddie and i have invented a community puke bowl. explanation later
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
Her little brother walked in right as I was finishing and was like "uhhh hey there's a lunar eclipse outside"
Woke up on the kitchen floor cuddling with the dummy we made of you. Hope your internship is going well.
Also, the wait staff kept prematurely clearing my Manhattans. Not sure if it was an oversight or a hint.
hungover at the ER to get half my contact removed from behind my eye. Not the start to the weekend I was hopin for
On a totally unrelated note, captain four hour sexcapades lost it in his boxers this morning and tried to pretend it didnt happen. Lmao
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
You should have hard cock pics on hand to send in the situation that you can't stop driving, pull out your cock, browse the countless pics I've sent you of my tits, get him hard and text a pic through. I mean, it's simple sexting ettiquette.
Lost my virginity dressed as catwoman. He was dressed as batman. Glad I waited.
Well sure, my hetero side is thrilled, but my gay side is soooo judging
Good friends go out of their way to crop dust your ex not once but twice. I knew we were friends for a reason
I passed out drunk in her bed. Her boyfriend showed up and told me to go to the other room or we were gonna have a threesome. I threw up off the side of her bed and left. I feel like that was an adequate response.
There was puke outside of my classroom and lecture was half empty. Damn thirsty thursday is intense
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