Every time we have sex I can't stop thinking about Jesus
There is now a Twilight themed dildo. What do YOU want for christmas??
Wow anytime a scalper has i need tix written on the back of a franzia box thats a trusted seller
swear to god, just saw some chick dressed in a full chicken costume buying eggs and telling the cashier that she "just wants her babies back."
buy whatever she's on. a lot of it.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
You don't even know the meaning of faking an orgasm until you sleep with an uncircumcised ginger.
Don't count me out just yet. Considering bartering a blowjob to see if that boy from work will take my shift.
Who wrote Most Moistest Dad on my chest and what the fuck does it mean?!?
You are literally throwing a tangerine right now. Beer pong is not played this way
Just don't let me fall on anything that can be broken. Unless its a dick
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
My worst fear almost came to light...I was choking and the cats stared at me like they had no problem eating my face if I died
i think you lost all your innocence when you were caught straddling a fence in your thong & cowboy boots by the 40 year old apartment manager
i actually texted him "nice to see you" but then there was a saved draft "i think about you when i get off." dodged that bullet...
He has blue eyes of sex and i am powerless against them
Doesn't tell me where my computer chair went but good to know
I've orgasmed so many times tonight I think I've become enlightened
LET ME HAVE MY JUDGMENT OF OTHER PEOPLE
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