I think we need to take a brake
What upsets me the most about that is that you spelt it 'brake'
just took a sink shower in Arbys bathroom
I just recycled a years worth of liquor bottles. I can feel my alcoholic carbon footprint shrinking
Just because we buy weed together doesn't mean were a couple
I know its hard to believe that I'm already drunk at 12 p.m. but I am, so dont call me asking to go to the gym.
Hahhaha I literally just rolled outta bed and went to get beer in my pj's and slippers. God I love graduating
Idk if I woke up next to a cat or raccoon. either way it's purring.
You were on shrooms and "the trees are crazy green!" is all you could manage.
We stopped mid-sex and both shotgunned a beer then got back to it. Is this what love feels like?
I'll send you pictures of my nipples so you don't feel left out.
I just need to find a good handlebar mustache to sit on until I'm over that beard
im buying my prof a giftcard to the state store bc he talked ab crying into a glass of tequila so he deserves it
You stopped loving me for a minute.
You sent me "Is nap," I don't think that really counts as a conversation starter.
mcfuck me up
MCFUCK ME UP INSIDE
I will not go because I am a man of my word and of my penis.
Randomize
