U r making out with a 12 year old get ur shit together
Her sister's ass was worth my getting thrown out of the house.
do you ever think like no deep thought could take place in the spanish language? like all they talk about is like tacos?
how high are you?
We didn't have a blender for the margaritas, so she tried to use the garbage disposal and wasted half a handle of my grandpa's good tequila.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
She's just done the monthly not prego dance around our kitchen
Hey ask him if he likes swappy seconds
At least his std test came back clean, gotta look at the positives here
But seriously I might need help getting spray paint off of my body.... But don't worry about the penis I scrubbed him already
My dad told me I would need to be my mom's DD tonight. So, that's how my Easter weekend is going down.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
I just found weed in my bra #magicboobs2k16
Is there something wrong with us? Seriously.
Possibly, but I'd rather not fix it.
I just poured two shots of fireball into my Rapunzel mug I love finals.
Well I hate to admit it but at this point I can successfully say i have been pee'd on by both of my roommates.
I figured it out! There's blood on the kitchen floor because I fell into the dishwasher. And there's a face dent. And it doesn't work.
Yea.....I saw that happen.
Oh my god, my vagina is cursed. He's cursed my vagina so that no one but him can maintain a boner around me. I'm sure of it.
Randomize