i'm writing my speech about my 4th grade backstreet boy concert experience. that sums up how seriously i take my life.
She wanted to test if her costume allows her to still have sex in it. It does
i had to pay fifty dollars for throwing up in the limo, 60 fucking dollars to throw up all over myself
she wanted to watch hairspray while we fucked. she's obviously your kinda girl, dude.
He snuck out of bed at 9 am and came back with pizza and a bottle of wine. I think I'm in love!
all I know is I'm really rwfly really really stoned and a bunch of Korean people are yelling at me
Hooked up with 8 guys, puked 4 times, got a few bruises, and my face is still numb... I think this visit has truly impacted my college decision
It's not that I even wanna fuck these guys anymore, just cuddle that's all. My conscience has never been so proud.
And then my night got REAL pukey
As he was cumming he yelled "Yahtzee" then said im free to go. Thats my one night stand
OMG -- There are strippers in the bathroom crying because their power moves aren't good enough to win the competition
Helped a guy at work today that did nothing but stare at my chest....safe to say the Girls were looking G.O.O.D. today.
If I had any lingering questions about my sexuality, the strip club tonight verified I'm 100% gay
I'm so high I have morphed into the monopoly man. Or maybe the Pringles guy. I don't know but I have a mustach now
Just stopped at a cross walk because the light turned red 3 streets down. I'm way too high.
Randomize
