My recently uploaded pictures to facebook: Me partying on Beale St. with a single girl on each arm. Ex's recently upload pictures: Several pictures of cats. I win.
it feels like my vag is blowing bubbles
She transformed our coors light pitcher we stole from the bar into a fruit basket...
He just became a fan of Chelsea Handler on Facebook. WHY DO I ALWAYS PICK THE GAY ONE
this girl is having heart failure because she lost her feather...a gypsy blessed it in turkey. Not sure im high enough for this
you know...the drug dealer i named my baby after.
There are 3 guys sitting in the elevator in lawn chairs wearing sunglasses and holding beers. the hallway rugs are stuffed in a trash can. i've never been so glad to be sober.
Last thing I remember clearly was, "ok, but if we're are gonna get drunk before class, there's no half-doing this"
We were walking up the stairs and I asked Dominick what floor the party was on. The cop who had just tried breaking it up was walking down the stairs, drinking a slurpee, and answered, "Third floor."
Hey I can officially say I made out with a drug lord.
Oh. So it is a cult
Basically. But a nice cult. They eat muffins and talk about fundraising.
You have not lived until you've slid down a waterfall fucked out of your mind. Fact.
How did they ever let a trainwreck like myself run a bar?!
Just had a threesome with my best friend and LSAT teacher...just checked three things off my bucket list in one night
I don't want to spend an inordinate amount of time with you, I want to have sex with you. Duhhhhhh.
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