I went out, and slept with my sunglasses on
I'm going to use my one free fuck up card tonight.
What'd you do?
Its more like what im about to do.
That bitch is like a bad destiny's child song.
He just screamed at her, "if you pass out i am still having sex with you!!!" In front of the entire party.
I'm not saying he's gay. Just that he prob knows what a dick tastes like
I saw hookers! I saw hookers! I saw hookers! I saw hookers! I saw hookers! I saw hookers! Live in the flesh!
I dont think problem is the right word. Problems arent something you enjoy. Life would be too boring without gambling.
he asked if thats how we do it in the states..like there's cultural difference in fucking between canada and the us..
Just got physical proof that at 6 am i was running around with raw potatoes threatening to mash them on his floor. Hello, Mobile uploads
I wanted to take a shower but I forgot we made applesauce in it last night.
He could stay over, if you'd just ask.
Yeah. What am I supposed to say? "Oh, my couch is occupied, but my vagina's not"
I need a nap, Harry Potter movies, and dick in this exact order after work.
I'm eating a bagel on the toilet and watching porn. Trust me, I've got my priorities straight.
Bitch got stabbed in the eye. With a fork. Wait for it... At church. I was the only one at a party interested in her story. Only in the south
you drug him to get him horny then deny him sex. freaks.
Randomize
