YOu come back ASAP and we will do whatever you want baby
My wife caught me jerking off, I had to tell her I was thinking bout her
I really love her but I don't think I can go the rest of my life without anal.
Isn't the perk of being in a relationship not having to put in effort for sex?
I wouldn't really call it 'getting lucky' considering I paid her to do it.
Just finished my law exam. Questions 4-18 seemed to pertain specifically to things we've done this semester.
i was actually impressed that she managed to throw up underwater while scuba diving
She refered to her bed as the "cockpit"....I understand that this morning.
Youre attempt to ruin my night by putting Date Rape by Sublime on my sex playlist failed. She was into it.
He threw me over his shoulder and carried me outside, all the while drinking from the bottle of rum he was holding, while my ex watched. I'm winning the break-up.
You were drunkenly dancing with a statue you affectionately referred to as "The Captain." I wasn't going to deny your happiness.
I can't believe he's mad at you for not remembering your fake anniversary.
You know your life has gone off the rails when waking up in a Spanish hospital with alcohol poisoning and no memory of how you got there is not even your top wildest drinking story.
Um. I just realized I still have a beer in my purse from last night. I'm at work. I am so classy.
4 of us. Guys and girls. Were sitting there discussing the passed out half naked Brit girl on the floor. She is no longer the international woman of mystery.
Randomize
