Small penises have feelings too.
come over
yeah sure
wait who is this again? my contacts got deleted...but tell me and ill be there in 10
it's like iHOP with fire
You remember that guy Joey? The pastors son that plays Jesus every year?
Yeah?
Stuck it in his pooper.
I just shot gunned a beer for your birthday alone because you're too hungover at midnight to get out of bed. I'm not sure which of us is the bigger loser
At the pride parade. It's not even noon and I'm drunk as shit... for equality of course
Also, never say you're cool with a threesome if they ask. That shit's a trap.
On monday, while we were having crazy monkey sex, I earned $82. Vacation pay rocks.
he may be homeless but his dick however is not... anymore.
Man I'll cab it I'll be sloshed by then. There's turtles involved
Just used my flashlight app to find a gummy lifesaver I dropped on the floor
I like how you're utilizing your resources
I'm eating Swedish fish out of my boobs and watching SOA.. There is no way your Tuesday night will be better than mine.
MEG JUST LICKED A DRAIN PIPE. DAVE PUNCHED MATT IN THE THROAT. ALL BOUNDARIES ARE DOWN. I REPEAT. ALL BOUNDARIES ARE DOWN.
Driving, getting head and talking to your boss on the phone is not a good combination. I nearly died
yeah, i thought because of the nature of his job he would have been better at it, but i guess there's a difference between a bagpipe and vagina
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