So some girl kept staring at me and giving me these weird looks. That's when I realized she could probably hear the Mulan soundtrack playing on my iPod...
When he came he kept saying "oh god oh god" and he sounded just like his dad. awkward...
I almost died in that meeting. Nearly dried up and blew away in the pure powder form of boredom
I know that feel bro
Sometimes the gods of alcohol choose to take you on a mysterious journey and you just have to go with it
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
I have nothing to say other than the obvious 'we probably shouldn't have done that' and the less obvious 'i think you bruised my labia major' ...?
I used my iced coffee to ice the bump on my head from last night
PENIS EMOJIS WOULD MAKE MY LIFE SO MUCH EASIER GAH WHY DOES THE WORLD HATE ME
We started a fund for a baby in a wine glass, I think we're pretty responsible.
Had to leave my skype meeting to vomit. I'm obviously ready for the real world.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
so hungover i had to get off the train to puke, rallied and went to work. not sure if that's an adulting win or fail
We sexted for four hours straight. Is this really what my life has come to?
I'm a grown ass woman. Treat me like one. Fuckboy
what are you getting to drink for new years?
well seeing as how i just got diagnosed with a uti, whatever we can mix with cranberry juice
my ex finally blocked me on all social media and tbh I'm only pissed because his roomate just got a puppy
Ate a slug for 39 dollars
I wouldn't expect anything less from a PhD student
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