Fake titties should be able inflate and deflate like tires. So on Saturday you can put on your Double D hooker titties or Sunday put on your size B church tits.
I was high enough to understand and function with 'flip' while playing brick breaker
Damn. I don't think I could ever be that high.
nothing like Chinese food and masturbating on a Saturday night
The usual. Woke up on a dog bed with peeps and $11.
I swear to Christ if it turns out to be an intervention, i will set you on fire.
You took my underwater blowjob virginity.
I feel like my nipples were chewed on by alligators.
See, the Lortab wasn't working enough, so I thought "hey, vodka can speed that up! That's how science works!" Which probably should've been my indication that the Lortab was in fact working
He looked at me like he knew me, and I looked at him like I had seen his penis before.
So I feel like I should have had a going away party for your dick. Complete with balloons and cake. Yeahh that's right. I'm gonna miss it.
All I know is I was bleeding, she was bleeding, we stole someone's Lucky Charms, and then I made you guys order a pizza
i peed in the parking lot at work not even thinking, a woman saw
Guess who has two thumbs and broke her boyfriends dick?
What's your opinion on eating ass? Just looking for a yes or no
I don't know where I'm at. But I'm pretty sure what I'm looking at is a small bear.
Randomize
