Ive created a fbook group called "threesome" and invited two girls. Im not going to say a word and just see what happens.
The dean held back my hair as I was puking after graduation. That means so much more than a diploma and a handshake.
season finale of lost and an oz of weed. tonight my mind is going to be blown.
In my defense it was my birthday and I really wanted to do it.
we went to get a refill in his room and ended up having sex and passing out. then he woke me up with sex and gave me a beer for breakfast. i never want this to end
As I was climbing out of the pool he slapped my ass and said 'stay golden', i don't know why but it felt right.
Nothing like a marijuana chart of usage in each country to make me understand math.
I drunk dialed my ex-boyfriend last night. He was sitting next to my new boyfriend. Shoot me in the face.
You'll get a boner for sure
Way ahead of you. Kinda awkward while paying rent but hey
You know you drank too much last night when your mouthwash tastes like water
Why is there broken glass in my purse?
You stole a snow globe. From your VP. Soooo...maybe don't put all your hopes on that promotion you were expecting
Who knew you could get a drunk in public when jogging with your dog?
of all the things that should kill me, scurvy wont be one of them
In reference to the club we were headed to our cab driver told us about the time he had sex with a woman on the dance floor there. And what do you know, they're celebrating their 22 marriage anniversary together this year! True love does exist!
I know you're having some issues right now but can we focus on the gangbang?
Randomize
