i'm pretty confident that i watched a woman making love to a german shepherd.
i wanted to sleep on a waterbed so i filled up my bathtub so i could fall asleep in it...
that's the ideal party shoe. cute, but i can still puke in them.
I don't know if you realize how depressing it is to get your card denied....when you're only spending $4.
I'm sitting in the middle of them on his bed, forcing them to watch Brokeback Mountain. I am the best cock blocker ever.
Also you were throwing your phone yelling this is durable as shit
Either way you look at it, I'm a slut. But either way I look at it, I'm having a fucking blast.
come on down! you are the next contestant on the night is drunk!
Well Im currently dressed up as batman raiding frat houses for booze
In all seriousness...vodka, almond milk and chocolate syrup make a decent white russian.
When you sober up and come in here, I'm in your bed because you pissed on me in mine. So fuck. Off.
THERE IS A VIDEO OF DMX SINGING RUDOLPH THE RED NOSE REINDEER
I'm officially in the Christmas spirit
I am going to go Miley Cyrus crazy if I don't get sex soon
Headline in the alligator: young zeta goes berserk after lack of sex and is found naked swinging from wrecking ball on university ave, refuses to get down until sex partner is found
Is that a question you really want to ask or do you just want to tell you that I can't walk without feeling like my legs are collapsing underneath me
I accidentally made jungle juice last night.
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