just smoked a blunt while listening to nsync. i now know what my childhood was missing.
I only had sex with her cause she looked like jwoww from jersey shore
You were in my dream and you got the lyrics to lollipop tattooed on your chest. Don't get it, it wasnt that cool.
how bad would it be if i made his twitter my home page?
I lost my phone so I put sticky notes all over my roommates body asking her to wake me up at 7:00 AM.
the last thing i remember is ordering pitchers of white russians....
This place doesnt have redbull or serve shots. Its like they are at war with fun.
No, we have matured. We've stopped having sex in front if his room mate.
Well last time he got out of rehab he lasted 6 hours. So 3 days this time is quite an accomplishment.
Do you know how I hurt my ankle or my shoulder? Or the origin of any of the following mystery bruises: left quad, left wrist, right elbow. Thanks for playing.
I actually feel a twinge of sadness recycling all of our handles... I feel like I'm throwing out some great memories or lack of them because we don't remember
I think if my mom ever finds out about my nipple piercings I'll just be like "mom, tbh it's a sex thing"
The moment I said this burrito on my nuts feels really good is the moment I knew I was drunk
I really don't know how I went from having a few drinks to waging war against ghosts in my apartment but here we are
I feel like I had a successful night. I flashed the guy at the liquor store last night for 2 free tshirts and a giant redbull.
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