Where are I am going home with Ryan
I don't know who this or Ryan is but it is probably too late to talk you out of it
sometimes in life you just needs hand puppets
She rolled a blunt with one hand...and instantly I had a boner, I'm going to marry this girl.
I just bedazzled my weight watchers points calculator. You can tell I'm gay.
i'm behind the bar giving him a hand job. i need stuff to make my foot stop itching.
okay, this is where i needed to clarify that i was kidding before when i said that jizz helps mosquito bites. but let me know how that goes. for future reference.
Woke up with a full plate of KFC next to my face. I didn't really question it.
Showed up 2 hours late and still drunk nobody gave me a high five. This intership is bullshit.
I think that last shot was nyquil. Please come gte me. WINGS.
Right, well, that begs the question of where did you get the whip, why are you using it, and why don't you carry one around more often?
Bad news: I found out that girl you want has a boyfriend. Good news: she'll probably cheat on him with you. Better news: after seeing the way she treats him, that's the most interaction you're going to want with her anyway. Trust me.
You did things that should be illegal to a Twinkie and asked strangers to drive you home.
I don't know what she looks like but I'm pretty sure she has a pussy.
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I swear to god if you settle for a trump supporting packers fan, I will not acknowledge your children. You're better than that.
I've decided I will have no shame for the things I don't remember doing.
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