Ohh the wonderful, yet disgusting things she can do with her hair
Dude, I just spun my iPhone on my boner without it falling off. I belong in cirque du soleil.
I was so high last night. I wrote a poem about my salt shaker
I bet you think you're really funny for switching my line of coke with a line of protein powder.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
tell that swedish kid i didnt take his shotgun. he GAVE it to me.
Legit I think I might have gotten hepatitis C from licking the window of that last cab.
I had to photo shop your nipple piercings. that was extremely awkward.
I left after my shirt got dropped in the toilet thinking that there was absolutely no good that could happen the rest of the evening. I hear I was very wrong.
Hooked up with a guy solely because he had a chameleon. Priorities.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
I'm so glad we both made out with him though. I feel like that really brought us together
I just don't wanna be that girl with no ride and no pants
Jesus tap dancing Christ rock out with your cock out is supposed to be just an expression. And even if it weren't no one wants pics bro.
Update: He still has devil magic genitals.
That's the second time the same cop pulled me over well a different girl was giving me road head
Every day I wake up and there is no spectacular morning wood waiting for me I get so sad.
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