Don't interrupt me, I have a limited time to be high and thus be remarkably good at Pac Man
i woke facing the corner with my computer and i had googled "how to put out a fire" i am so scared to turn around
Fuck, now I'm not only the other woman, but the pregnant one
He took a shot, then proceeded to puke into the bucket he was iceing his broken foot in
Wanna go watch Transformers and scream "AMERICA!"? I need a no thought activity
It's an "im going to have to shit with the lights off" type of morning
Well last time he got out of rehab he lasted 6 hours. So 3 days this time is quite an accomplishment.
I guess I was blacked out I hopped a fence and hugged a cow that night.
There is a severe lack of banging on that itinerary... I'd like a revision on my desk within the hour
I just set my acrylic nail on fire while trying to light my blunt
However many condoms you have, it isn't enough.
His mom came while we were asleep naked and started asking me about my plans after high school... Is that even a thing.
He's my blizzard buddy. We're blowing lines and doing a 3D game of thrones puzzle
Didn't think I'd be dancing with the Power Rangers but here I am
Okay I’ll say it... THIS MOVIE FUCKS
That’s probably the first time I've heard Little Women described that way and I love it
Randomize
