I basing my decision on whether or not to date someone on whether I could imagine having sex with them sober
So I just googled the ten commandments... Were fucked.
To be honest I don't know what's worse, the fact that I interupted their shower sex or the fact that I was so drunk I used the adjoining stall anyway
Thinking about fake proposing to my gf just so the middle aged women next to us will buy us drinks
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
I mean its cheating, but i figure i've made out wiht married chicks before so its like a nicotine patch, quitting by doing less and less each day
I'm going on a valentine's date with the random guy i hooked up with in the bar bathroom this weekend...i feel like julia roberts
She was covered in mud grabbed my crotch and said see that handprint that means I called dibs
this dude just showed up to the party with a falcon
i need to stop celebrating other people's birthdays like they are m own.. my body can't handle a birthday every week
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
Are you drunk? Because I am and if you're not, this may be very awkward in the morning
Thats for me to know and you to find out.
Alex I've come up with a new medical condition. dick depression. it's a real thing and I have it
I'm at that stage of drunk where just imagining having sex makes me motion sick.
You had sex with a Scottish dude with a peg leg....how could I NOT tell that story??
I'd still fuck that
You'd fuck a dead moose
Quite possible
I'm drinking because I just started here and every single person I work with wants to quit and when I asked a coworker how she's doing she literally just started crying.
Randomize