to do: lose virginity to hamster dance
If Jon and Kate can get divorced...how hard can it be for me?
some kid came into the principals office and tried to explain what he was sent there for through interpretive dance.
Just realized the fur coat I am wearing to the wedding is the one I had sex with the groom in
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
Is "when in doubt date the guy with the bigger dick" a good philosophy?
just imagine me sitting naked on a toilet with a fully-clothed dude i havent seen in 2 years, trying to make normal conversation except that im covered in blood and he's helping wipe me down while i try not to pass out because blood makes me NERVOUS. And he's apologizing and i'm apologizing.
Successfully put eye drops in while driving with my glasses on. Stoner level: expert
Today is my 3 year wedding anniversary...and I've seen three different dicks.
What is my life coming to that I have to cross state lines to get laid?
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
It's acceptable to bring him back to my parents house and fuck on the couch right??
I don't want my vagina anymore.
Everything is bullshit and I hate everyone
A to Z: fucking your way through the alphabet
It'll be a kids book
He shit with the door open. I think that means we are in a realtionship.
So apparently I tried texting you last night to tell you I wasn't coming home, but all I had typed were lyrics from Evita
Randomize