We made it safely. Thanks for the call though.
North Korea, Best Korea!
and then he said that the only reasonable explanation as to why I got swine flu was because all I ever do is join the bandwagon
he said 'i want to be the peanut butter to your jelly, just without the crust' and then tried to take me shirt off
Immaculate conception is definitely the most boring way to conceive a child.
Also managed to rip my pants and set myself on fire. And oddly enough I'm still not ready to ask for 2010 back.
We left an ass print on the piano.
Note to self glow in the dark nail polish can be quite the mood killer during sex especially when you notice its working for the first time and you stop everything your doing to do spirit fingers
I gotta find new tactics tho. There's just so many tied up dicks one can look at before part of your soul dies.
She said she was jealous that i could wear headbands, then growled at the ground in shame..
At 4 am, making my walk of shame, the hotel security followed me to my car with his flashlight shined directly on me. I felt like either a criminal or like I was about to get raped. Can't a girl sneak out of a hotel room without an actual spotlight on her?!?!?!
If I take diet pills with my edibles I'll be a perfect person
I think that's the first time Navy dress blues and a Ninja Turtles onesie have been involved in the same makeout.
Sorry for all the texts. I got wasted and woke up at the foot of a staircase. From what I can gather, I fell down it.
thanks again for a nice night (and please don't fuck my boss)
Randomize
