Life lesson: when driving and throwing up, choose a paper bag over plastic. Fuck my life.
Have u ever been so drunk that pissing urself felt like a better idea than walking to the bathroom? I entered those waters last night
I looked at my arm when I woke up..I guess after 8 tally marks I said fuck it and wrote "too much"
its family weekend so i'm givin my little bro a tour of everywhere ive thrown up on campus
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
Tonights theme there is the 7 deadly sins. Greed, envy, sloth, gluttony, sluttiness, fellatio and vodka.
1 I really miss college walks of shame 2 I think I may have killed this girls cat
Isn't it statistically impossible for THAT many ugly people to be in one place at one time?
I had fun last year but I was one half of the hoe train back then. At least I'll feel better about myself as a person this year.
I'm going to miss going to the strip club though.
I puked in my fridge last night while I was trying to get water
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
Considering adding a large amount of vodka to my tomato cup-a-soup at work. Save me.
This is actually a pretty big deal for him. I mean, he contacted a stranger out of concern for someone else instead of for sex.
That does show growth.
I could not handle jail. And my very angry parents.
Remind me to talk to you about nipple clamps.
I am witnessing a blind guy whip ass at beer pong
Hypothetically speaking of course, is it bad if a cat eats lube?
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