do you think it i'm gay because i was in a 3 way lastnight?
well not if you dont touch the other dude and concentrate on the chic
what chic?
Yours is on the dinner table...mine is in my underwear drawer.
I just puked in the walgreens aisle buying gatorade and advil for my hangover... i guess i failed
better question... why wasnt i wearing a cape the previous 20 years of my life???
just puked in a purse in the store. some girl asked if i was gonna buy it now and i laughed and asked her why id want a bag some dude just puked in. her face looked like she saw the devil.
we need to find that guy that whips out his cock at the bar again
I met her at the liquor store. I hope I'm wearing a condom
He's against "violent sex" cause apparently my body is "sacred". Like dude I'm about to tell you about blowing your brother just so you'll fuck me like an animal Jesus Christ....
I think we need to stage a munchie intervention for Ben. I just watched him use a tortilla as a potholder to dump water out of his ramen.
Seriously though, passing out on the police station floor must have been priceless!
there is a guy with a glowstick staff outside my house
We're meant to be. Apparently God wants me to get dicked down pretty good too so I'm not complaining about destiny
honestly if there were pictures of last night i would be embarrassed.... im embarrassed without pictures
All my friends are getting married and I'm pole dancing in a tattoo shop. I don't know how I feel about this.
They spent thousands on one day. You made $76 in 30 minutes. You should feel great about that.
Just because you can't have him, doesn't mean you can have his brother.
What about the best friend?
Randomize
