There's a dildo in the cheerios box here...
I changed my mind about Tim Gunn. I like him now. Mostly because he said someone's dress looks like a gay t-rex. Or something.
i think i would be perfectly content if, on my deathbed, i could look back on a life that didn't have any fisting in it
He compliments me like a gay guy and fucks me like a starved nympho. I'm in love.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
She trust falled out of a window. It was like that scene from A Little Princess but with a lot more blood.
Brilliant thought; pill pong.
What could go wrong?
Thanks for the cold. I shartted and sat through a whole soccer game. James made 3 scores.
It's been a long time since I got "Talk about Glen's enormous penis" drunk
Please make sure you have solid number of friends around you that wouldn't be afraid to break a bottle and stab someone. If you're planning on drinking all of that, you're going to need a safety net.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
Riding the train home at 6 am for class still drunk is losing its novelty in my junior year
Came so hard my ears popped. This lovely piece of news and pissin in my driveway brought to you by rum
This is exactly why you shouldn't bang your bartender. Although the awkward free shots are a plus.
I'm deleting Tinder. I got there he rubbed my back and then proceeded to jerk off on me.
Nobody's dick fell into my mouth tonight
cant one of your roommates drive you?
You came in my eye once. You owe me.
ill be there in 20
Randomize