Getting fucked up met up rando with a girl I confesswed my love for last night. weird, going with it
i always forget guys have bellybuttons
Corey Haim died. 80's me is so sad
We are taking shots for every green Lon-Capa box we get for the homework.
that awkward moment when your booty call gets snowed in at your place.
She said my dick tasted like a junior mint. Ive decided im using this soap the rest of my life
Listen. I'm a changed woman. I have no problem using him for sex.
Dude I woke up in her bed wearing a top hat and bunny slippers and noticed one of us had pissed in bed. The last thing I wanted to ask for was a ride home
Well u missed Autumn's newly 21 yrs old sister flashing her tits and standing on the bar last night.
Haha at least the one I have like that you can't tell we are completely drunk and you're about to kick a glass out of my hand in a fit of joy over pizza.
I miss you too. And it was nice meeting your brother while I was mounting you
A drank guy in the ER just sang Trouble to me and when he sang 'Lying on the cold hard ground' he threw himself onto the ground and landed on the wrist he'd just broken. Thirsty Thursday is weird already and it's not even 5.
I traded him cumming in my face for a year for a Disney annual pass. One giant leap back for feminism, one small step for the adult child Disney fan.
Many a woman has been in tears over the passing of my penis' whorish ways.
Nothing kills the mood like opening another guy’s dick pic in bed
Randomize
