i need an iv and a liver transplant
Rocking a Headband at the strip club, because of Rock of Love this shit is like their kryptonite, I smell like stripper butter and back child support.
I'm watching a show called "I didn't know I was pregnant" on TLC...Apparently this happens enough that there is a series
Angelique from Rock of Love is now doing phone sex commercials for central illinois....id say she's going places.
Yeah things got weird. You ate an entire bag of hotdog buns, then tried to catch a tree on fire with a candle.
Got in a bar fight defending Prince. Thought you ought to know. He gets his dick sucked cooking eggs for breakfast.
Gina was bawling her eyes out and then she ran into the street and peed. she kept screaming "LOOK WHAT YOUVE DONE TO ME"
I just woke up tangled in fishing line while wearing someone else's bathing suit with fishes drawn all over me. What kind of sex did we have?
Are you drunk? Because I am and if you're not, this may be very awkward in the morning
Thats for me to know and you to find out.
I mean, I love her. But not "I'll have a threesome with her." Type of love.
A conundrum I think only you would understand: how to classily post "I need a ride to the liquor store" on one's Facebook wall?
I like how our relationship transcends the borders of inappropriateness and encompasses all the colors of the inappropriate rainbow.
I may have just masturbated while on hold with the IRS. don't judge me
You've changed since you got that strap on
Yeah I'm just gonna stay here and spread my horniness to the world.
Randomize