We need to find a way to make penises more like hookahs.
Its not like he dircectly choose a cheeseburger over sex, it was more like I said seductively "I really appreciate this and I'm going to make it up to you anyway I can" and he replied "i want a bacon cheeseburger"
i guess he just knew i was going to sleep with him either way
That's it, I refuse to live in a world where sparkly vampires beat Batman at anything.
Gay walks of shame are so much more Amy Winehouse than straight girls
He fell asleep and they duct taped him to the floor. He's pissed.
I mean, I know they're ugly, but I cant turn down a birthday threesome.
Ripped as fuck driving to get a portrait of my cat tattooed on my arm
This is three metal detector wands away from being the strangest porn I have ever been in the audience for.
Will i get arrested If i steal the salvatiion arny guys bell for ringing it to close to my hangover
i came so hard i kicked through my windshield
I didn't think four grown drunk men could cuddle on a twin size bed, but we found a way.
You get 5 min
Your time limits don't scare me, I'll include foreplay and redressing in that 5 min. If you wanted to challenge me you should say you got an hour, id be scared then and more creative.
He smells like cinnamon, and what I imagine to be orgasms
It's 90 percent alcohol, and 10 percent a whisper that says "get drunk"
I'm not 100 percent on this, but I think I just shit a lump of cement. What the fuck happened last night?
Randomize
