"it" just moved
That shot tasted like Sant Claus came in my mouth. I love the holidays.
I'm way too horny to be at work right now. I think it might be legally irresponsible to leave me alone with cucumbers.
We just licked a sour creme and onion chip for salt for a tequila shot. Our vacation has officially begun.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
The vodka told me to go iceskating on my frozen pool. I may have attempted.
i wish i coudl send you meat via computure
His beard is glorious and he smells like barbecue. Introduce me to him.
Find me a date. With a beard. I want him to rub his beard on my tits. I'm not even into that stuff but I think it'd be so warm.
I tried to interpretive dance to Candy Shop to stop the awkwardness.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
You gave me balls I gave you half a boob. Fair trade
dude, you declined head because you wanted to tell her about how you put cinnamon in your weed. also, we're low on Chef Boyardee
i want to have awesome sex and feel fuzzy.
Oh no. Not her. Her personality clashes with mine in ways that would make me wanna beat myself with a stick.
New fuck buddy and long time fuck buddy are carpooling home for thanksgiving. #10hrconvoaboutmyblowjobskills
ditto.
about cumming, not toast
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