the third sister isn't as attractive as the other two but I will do her anyway to finally pull off the fabled family hat trick.
we have officially mastered the walk of shame
Threesomes are so awesome. You even have company on your walk of shame :)
So I've been thinking a lot since she told me she's prego. But what I want to know is why my voice of reason sounds like Thomas fucking Jane!?
Every now and then I'll talk to a creeper for an extended amount of time. Randy, for instance, funded our entire night of horrible decisions.
I found a knife in my bed when I got back this morning. I think one of my roommates has it in for me
I dunno if we should get high tonight man. its daylight savings. time travel is just too much for me right now.
He kept waking up periodically throughtout the night to bit my ear and pass back out.
He wouldn't let me go down on him. He stopped me and told me he was a giver.
just walked into the study room and found an empty bottle of vodka and a passed out freshman. Did you have anything to do with this?
I mean thanks for the bj but i wanna forget everything that happened last night between 11 and 5
And then I told him since the day he walked away to get over what I went through he lost the boyfriend right to ask why my bed is broken.
I take full pride in being the one that broke ur bed. Want to go for the sofa?
As a plus, I've lost 5 pounds in two days, so "party all weekend" is officially a valid diet plan.
That edible kicked in right as I was upside-down on that rollercoaster. Fucking.mind.blown.
I promise not to pretend to be Jesus and take the wheel. But to my credit you shouldn't be saying that while I'm that drunk and we are in a car.
Randomize
