Brickbreaker makes my post drinking poops that much better. Sorry, I had to tell someone who might agree.
Nope changed our mind. Decided your strange bacon like body odor wasn't what we want to smell tonight.
Received world's greatest BJ while in a planetarium. Was seeing stars while seeing stars.
Dude squirt doesnt even begin to describe it i thought she was the lost portal to atlantis with how much she let out
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
Please tell me why your entire hallway smells like microwaved condoms.
So this guy is eyeing me from across the bar. Either the girl I hit on next to him is his girlfriend or he's her gay best friend. I should show him my Penis and find out.
Dude. Do it.
Definitely her date. But she saw it too. So now he used to be her date. Why can't this stuff Happen when I'm sober?
hooking up with him was much more fun when i knew in the back of mind we'd get in some sort of trouble for it
I think my nap took me to another dimension
I'm about to play another round of who's panties are in my car.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
did you just describe your masturbation session as "rad af??"
I just want somebody who'll randomly bring me pizza and lovingly squeeze my butt. Is there a dating app for that, do you think?
I was informed this morning that I took all my clothes off and ran around the whole apartment complex. Being as they just moved in, welcome to the neighborhood.
did you make it home?
i'm in a room and it looks like mine :)
hahah close nuff if it isnt
If I get my period the weekend your parents are gone i'm removing my uterus.
Gov of Georgia is going to allow massage therapists to return to work.
Gives a new meaning to 'Happy Endings'.
Randomize