found a dugout with weed in it in dad's car. decided to top up the weed compartment with salvia. for fun.
I forgot i ate a salad for dinner, so while i was barfing in his toilet, i kept screaming "i ate leaves?? i cant believe you let me eat leaves!"
We had to use the stains on Phil's shirt to try to piece together what happened last night.
OMG - This guy with a mullet just told me - it wasn't a mullet - but his hair dresser layered it wrong. It's so walmart in here. I hate you.
25 People Share How They Got Out Of Their Longest Dry Spell
we need 14,000 post its to execute this plan
He told me he doesn't dance and he hates drunken excitement. Why I ever thought it would work is beyond me.
you were fixing your hair in the bathroom mirror and then fell backwards through the locked stall while she was in mid pee and fell on her lap.
I don't even know where to begin....there's queso sauce and public hair stuck to everything
The heart of my unhappiness in my job is that it's not a place where coworkers and I can draw dicks on everything to amuse each other
21 People Confess Their Craziest Online Dating Experience
This is three metal detector wands away from being the strangest porn I have ever been in the audience for.
We got back from the bar and started watching bizzare foods, which subsequently led to the consumption of large amounts of rancid lunch meat and small insects.
You were just so carefree! People were like, "there's broken glass everywhere" and you were just like, IDGAFFFFFFF
I slept with a Brazillian Man, That's why I'm Watching The World Cup
like don't tell me my baby smooth vag offended you
Then James put his arms through the window and grabbed him, like he was Robocop. A nerdy, portly Robocop.
Who is this?