We're gonna have to suck it up and start making out for free drinks. No homo. I'm watching Tyra "I kissed a girl and I got free drinks."
Let's do it. All homo
i was sitting in the back seat of her car with her boyfriend while she was driving. it was pretty awkward, but i dont think "so my dick's been in your girl's mouth too" was a good ice breaker
I've hooked up with six guys in my ethics class next semester...I feel like I've failed already
I added "don't hook up with boys with girlfriends" to my new years resolution and realized how sad it was that it made me actually feel like a better person
Our idea of a "deep conversation" was successfully forming complete sentences.
when someone at the bar asked you a question all you knew how to say was "chug-a-lug"
Oh my god I peed in a park last night and then tried to set off fireworks with a group of middle-aged men
Ordained minister or not I hereby renounce all moral responsibility for any and all related occurrences
The entire state will know me by my boobs.
I don't think the TSA would be too happy. Who knows if three ounces of lube will be enough for us?
Yea... The gym isn't gunna happen today... When I was drunk last night I tried to prove I could front flip off the wheel cover of a semi... I fucked up my shoulder pretty bad... It was more of a roll
Hooked up with a guy that looked like Dean Thomas. Mediocre at best, but I stopped myself from calling him Dean in bed. So I got that going for me.
went out last night. woke up with a lisp.
Damn that brownie almost kicked my ass. I'm not sure if my flight home lasted 10 minutes or 10 days..
I'll be an awkward "I've had the grooms penis in my mouth" presence and we can party our nipples off.
Randomize
