you freaked out because you thought your face lotion was cum in a bottle
i wish i could swallow nair and shit it out and it would get rid of all my ass hair.
you made them have somersault races with you thru the lobby..
You spilled spaghetti on the floor, and kept telling the noodles to "settle down" as you tried to clean it up
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
I'm up to 9 pic of different guys. I need 4 more boys and each one of the 13 to submit 3 additional pics. I wanna make a penis deck of cards.
The druken crowd just broke into singing "God Bless America" while waiting the newlyweds to get in the limo. My friend is eating rose petals.
They all laughed at me when I bought that necklace from Life Alert. Who's laughing now?
and lets be real... who can blow a middle school class's sunday school teacher and keep a straight face ever again? NOBODY.
not sure when or how we ended up at this wedding party but you need to be here they are handing out screwdrivers and Yamakas to everyone and it's a got damn open bar you need to be here now
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
I'm thinking my boss switched to all cordless keyboards and mouses so that none of us would hang ourselves in the office.
The comfort of this onesie is keeping me single
He knocked me over backwards in my chair. I had a beer in each hand. Didn't spill a drop.
Kay so its 9 am whose dumbass is gunna act sober to buy pizza rolls
Dude you promised
I seriously just rolled a joint on my high school diploma. I feel like I've come so far.
Stereotypically, lax bros last the longest, but have huge egos that are annoying. Baseball players barely last 10mins, but are really nice. And than we have soccer players, last long and have no egos. Me and my friends have collected our findings.
Randomize