Sacagawea was the original milf.
Our relationship just reached the stage where i can touch her boobs while making a honking noise without getting hit in the face
2 classes, 3 finals, and $30 worth of adderall until this semester is over.
Got a thumbs up from a trucker for doing lines on the interstate. God bless america.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
i looked at my phone & had a message that said "tell your friend she needs to clean my livingroom, i dont appreciate her trying to turn it into a bubblebath." I give you probs.
Over 50% of the drunkest nights I have ever had began with me saying "I'll just drink my dinner" to you.
MY BRAIN IS OSCILLATING. DOES THAT EVEN MAKE SENSE
So what exactly does one do when my driver gets a DUI and is now arrested and I'm still hiding in the trunk?
I woke up on a boat next to an extremely attractive man wearing nothing but a life jacket. Neither one of us owns a boat...
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
It was so small.
Tiny. Got to love sexting. Imagine finding out the old fashioned way.
The guys who program Autocorrect have never seen a vagina in person
Never in my life have I been so excited to nap as I am right now.
By talk things out did he mean have passionate angry sex?
Not this time. I'm drinking in my sweatpants which means I've given up for the day and shouldn't be in public.
Naw dude theres seriously a lobster in my sock drawer. Why?
Randomize