Hahaha figures, hmm should I spank you? Or throw a cow at you?
Seriously, stop being so datable w your movie/song prefs
Dude this girl just said she'd take me to pleasure town while giving me head
Will Ferrell is probably jerking himself off somewhere wishing he was you
did i get hit in the head with a hammer? someone just asked me...
I'm so pissed my boobs hit the emergency stop button during my workout
Carrying your underwear around in your purse on Sunday morning is its own religious experience
You went home with a man in a loincloth
I just watched him leave in half a loincloth. Don't you just love Halloween???
Serious questions. Who is that girl? Why is she wearing a tiara? And why does she keep asking about penis piercings?
Filthy. I need to be power hosed with holy water.
So again no comment on the cleavage. I'm a bit disappointed. If those girls come together to make cleavage AND I send you a pic of it, you have to comment on it. That's like relationship 101.
Model at car show < day drinking with your favorite sister. Get your head in the fucking game Christopher.
dude, my hangover is telling me there was tequila involved
I've orgasmed four times in the past 24 hours. And my mom's dropping off cookies later
Probably not. Getting pulled over and puking my guts out on the side of the road in front of the cop and him making fun of me, was not my finest moment. Plus I lost my debit card.
Painted a stripper an elf costume. Her coworkers liked it. Now in a room full of naked strippers.
Randomize
