Its like we are women, and boise state is a gangster rap song. This game is degrading
he gave me an orgasm. multiple times. the weird stuff he did in middle school is now irrelevant.
Drunkenly found an error on my bar tab last night. THANK YOU ACCOUNTING.
Fucking freshmen need to learn how to puke in the bushes outside the dorm and not in the fucking elevator.
Like my mouth was on his pelvis connected to his balls that's how far it was
I vaguely remember having a cowboy explain his belt buckle to me in the bathroom hallway
I went on my dinner date pretending that my lunch date didn't jizz in my hair.
Hide in the closet. if you hear me yell patato salad come out swinging.
My bathroom smells like artichokes and absinthe. I am naming a perfume after you and using the money to buy new towels.
I'm pretty sure I just orgasmned my way out of paying for that weed
I had sex on a seadoo on the middle of the lake lastnight
cant one of your roommates drive you?
You came in my eye once. You owe me.
ill be there in 20
Woke up at 5am in an elevator... Pretty much tells you how my weekend went.
You sent me a pic of you peeing in two separate directions
and like half a dozen dick pics
I just asked Geoff what he is going to do because Hester left he said he was going to have gay sex with America.
Randomize