i'm sure there's a big cosmic reason for things working out the way they did. like, now you have awesome images to masturbate to.
she starting giving me head in the taxi..the driver told her to stop..she looked up, said "I'm the birthday girl", and kept on doing what she was doing.
Tomorrow will not be complet unless someone eats me out. Just sayin
so just saw tiger woods pull a page out of his wifes book and hit some kid in the head with a golf club
Smuggling a beer bottle full of vodka out of the bar with a tampon as a plug for the top of the bottle wasn't one of my classiest ideas... but your hangover proves it was resourceful and effective. Your welcome.
I have cum and leaves all over me. Don't ask questions.
Discovered a freckle on my clitoris. What have you done today?
He's getting me an energy drink and said good morning beautiful. He must sense i'm cutting him off from the sex.
He was supposed to visit me tonight but he decided to stop in Tacoma so now I'm sitting on my bed naked eating oranges and candy corn while I watch Parks and Rec.
Now I have to hook up with him tomorrow DURING THE DAY.
Just had ice cream and a blow job come together in one glorious, defining moment.
Why would you waste your Ritalin on your children?
Why do I have "apologize to Dave Coulier" written on my hand?
The minute he showed me his Mumford and sons tattoo is the minute i could literally feel my pussy dry up
He asked if we were going to take advantage of his drunken state. When we said no he tired to show us what we were missing out on. It was so sad it almost made him cute.
How's the party?
I'm watching two people get flogged. Sothere's that.
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