My ? Is...... Would it be sweet or creepy to take a girl on a first date to chigago?
creepy.
It all came flooding back to me: there was a woman with one hand
apparently red wine has the total opposite effect that whiskey does on his dick
the more i look through evidence of last night, the less i seem to remember.
Today's lesson: while in the shower, one should choose between either drinking OR shaving. Not both.
Aww you are cute. With your penis. And failures.
Road construction signs are deceptively heavy
I hate him and his pretentious your-sleeping-in-the-wet-spot look.
well I was pissed. first he yelled at me for having my own condoms, then he got mad when they didn't fit him. Dude, I only fuck magnum men.
We hooked up. It felt slightly wrong considering he is my foreign exchange student but there's a reason America imports. Foreigners got the goods.
In hindsight combining orgy Thursday with mystery drink madness was begging for failure
we def had a heart to heart that turned into a BJ last night
In other news, I just burned my penis
Welp, just took a tab of acid and cracked one of three bottles of champagne... Mondays ¯\\_(ツ)_/¯
So...I'm pretty sure I have officially determined that reverse cowgirl is the only position possible to have sex in my smart four two
Randomize
