Wooohooo! I'm sitting in the car like a creep watching people walk in and out of Blush. Lots of happy people.
We woke up, fucked, and shared a piece of my sister's first communion cake for breakfast.
And you thought you were going to hell last weekend.
I need to have sex with you on our hotel room window ledge... This is a need not a request.
yeah a little bit of me felt bad about it. But the rest of me was having sex with him.
sooo what's the appropriate music to listen to after you find out the dude you been fucking, is legit married with kids...what genre is that?
Its a little weird going to a wedding where I've screwed the bride and my wife has screwed the groom. Great wedding though.
Your stoned with a 2 year old in the room....and that makes you want to have babies?!
I'm imagining a seal in an ugly shirt hahahahaha Percocet
Dude it's SB. It's a proven fact that all you need to survive on is beer, weed, chips and maybe some amphetamines
you and him went to the park at 2am to "catch a pigeon" and ACTUALLY CAME BACK WITH A PIGEON
We were wearing togas. So having sex was really easy to do without taking any clothes off.
Yay! Also. When you're coming down eat waffles and touch yourself. You won't regret it.
He just ranted to some customer about fourth of July being ruined and I just shouted USA the whole time in the background. It was kinda epic
i showed up really high and was trying to not be,so in order to not seem high, i got plastered
YOU'RE NOT THE ONE BEING EVISCERATED BY YOUR OWN UTERUS SO GET SOME DAMN SLEEP YOU FOOL!
Randomize
