i think i just saw hanson at the grocery store. one might have been a girl. hard to tell. lets call that one taylor.
I was debating whether her purse was real then I saw her puke in it.
So I accidentally txted this girl with the same name as the one im seeing, as it turns out shes still dtf
used foursquare to find where i am. please come get me. this is the scariest bedroom ever.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
You can't break up with me and ask me for a handjob on the same day. At least not in that order.
I think my mom knows im high. It could be because im slow dancing with my cat in the kitchen. The dip and kiss is what gave it away.
I'm really hoping to find some quality strange ass tonight while at my court appearance.
I'm sitting on the toilet just to avoid my bosses look of disapproval
It was one of those nights where you get back from the bar and end up staying up till 3AM beating off to facebook photos of girls from college
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
Fool me once shame on you. Fool me twice and I'm the idiot missing half an eyebrow again.
would it be uncouth to smoke a joint during office hours
This is why you're my favorite TA
WE'RE MOVING TO IRELAND!!!! DON'T ASK QUESTIONS JUST BOOK THE DAMN FLIGHT!!!!
I don't care how hot she was, she wouldn't stop singing "Shut Up and Dance", instant boner-killer.
Yeah come over whenever. Weed gets here at 8.
I'll be there at 7:59.
Most people that see those numbers aren't going to realize what they mean and those that do will think 'oh those must be her favorite hockey players' and not 'oh she wants to see those hockey players fuck each other'.
Randomize