I always feel awkward when im sitting at home watching the price is right and the fat contestant get the gym equipment.
the best part about tonight...knowing when i wake up in the morning his car will still be full of packing peanuts..and mine wont
lets make a pact to never make a pregnancy pact
I'm pretty sure you can't just waltz into a walk in clinic and ask them to de-baby you.
I walked in and she was doing shots, betting the managers if any of the customers would notice, and screaming that nothing would ruin her Saturday night. Say what you want, I like working with my sister.
It was as if you forgot how to speak normally. All of your words came out either backwards or in song form
he thinks the dog can do a keg stand. i will let you know how it turns out
You really need to get over the whole "jail" thing. Its really not that bad.
i looked at my phone and realized all i had said to her the entire night was misspelled variations of "NOTHING IS THE SAME" over and over. she eventually stopped replying.
I need to do something profound in the next three and a half years so that when my kids ask what I did in my twenties I have something to say other than "made bad decisions"
I think he offered to cook me dinner or cook me for dinner. Not really sure. Just smiled and nodded.
how bad is she
captain morgan with tits
My general physician told me i have the emotional capacity of a 2 year old, While he refilled my xanax prescription. That's service!
I'm turning into an adult here.
Adults touch each other's special zones.
I was going to try being motivated today. But then I took a hit while still in bed.
Randomize
