Just gargled Fireball to get the fish taco taste out of my mouth. Almost as good as gum.
I hate my date so much right now for even thinking I want to do the electric slide.
"Morning after" poops are always like, interesting.
You were passed out on the chair and when I asked you if you were okay you looked up and said "I'm fine, I was just pretending for a picture" then passed out again.
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We decided we needed a drinks fridge in our bathroom.
All I remember is running out of the bathroom with one shoe on and the other in my hand. Pretty sure I was yelling as well.
I'm not leaving bed today. And i guess my drunken ass last night hit my roommate in the face with a tiki torch then proceeded to cry while carrying around a picture of he who must not being name. I'm a piece of work.
I think I'm still drunk and I think you were in my dream (sadly, it was not a sexual bill murray one).
ok thanks goodnight
Also before you go to bed i just have to get it out there that i really like macklemore as a person
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Kyle found me outside his apartment in the hallway. Said he didn't hear me knock bt smelled alcohol through the door. I'm sucha bitch to my liver
I woke up and discovered I gave new meaning to the term "pizza pockets" yes it's exactly like it sounds like
we should definitely drink gin again. soon.
I'm not gonna lie. The thing I miss the most about him right now is the air conditioned hotel rooms.
I cried while dry heaving in the back of the car to the New York song with jay z in it. I was singing it inbetween gags.
I just ordered cookies for delivery. My life is falling apart.
Oh! I forgot to tell you. Part of that weird ass dream last night. I was jamie lee curtis and I cut off all my hair because yogurt.
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