He looks like Jesus, if Jesus had let himself go.
Well, I'm a guy so I don't have one, but if its anything like the inside of my nose, yes, vodka would burn.
You passed out in the bathroom with the door locked. Had to take a shit in your litter box. Don't worry, your cat buried it for me.
Urine might work for jellyfish stings, but we found out it doesn't work well for nose bleeds...
And then like 10 minutes later they were taking a bath together. HOW DOES HE DO IT.
ill do whatever it takes for me to get more high and eat pie
The liquor store guy just accused me of buying alcohol of minors due to how many bottles I got. The guy should be used to this from me.
No, this is a senior booty call. It cannot be ignored.
I just very easily got pretty high off of one bowl of shitty dirt weed. I'm a sad excuse for who I used to be.
Think I just subconsciously wanted a cigarette and started sleep walking to Carl's.. Didn't realize what I was doing until I found myself in an elevator.
Is this a drinking picnic?
Is there another kind?
No one parties "Full Karen". She once broke a couple up at the bar, ate the girl out in the bathroom and took the guy home.
Omg my butt feels so much better. Those suppositories are magic. It feels like Jesus fingered me in my sleep.
I think my brain has decided it's boycotting life until it can do whatever it wants.
grapes are the best munchies food ever cuz like the juice explodes in my mouth and my mouth gets all relieved of dryness. and the skin of the grape is like the food. and theres so many grapes!
Randomize
